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Punishment thoughts

Susan on Tuesday, September 18 2012, 11:20 PM
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I did a worksheet on my mom (s.g.) the day before yesterday. I had the most clarity of any worksheet I have ever done on what my punishment thoughts were. They came up one after the other while I was doing the worksheet: I'm going to punish my mother by never going shopping with her again, then a snide remark, then by not doing any more work around the house, then a temper tantrum, then anger, then rage. And then punish myself by throwing everything away.

Now, since then, I can see all kinds of punishment thoughts while they occur. I don't even realize I'm having a worksheet moment and then, oh...there's a punishment thought! Must be a worksheet moment!

Wow! What an awakening. It's kind of unnerving, though, walking around knowing how much time I spend acting like I'm 4 years old... :p
Sending Love!
       
  • Replied by Timothy J. Hayes, Psy.D. on Wednesday, September 19 2012, 05:21 PM · Hide · #1
    Dear Susan,
    This is a great insight and represents a very high level of willingness to see what you have hidden from yourself. Congratulations.
    The issue of punishment thoughts is very important and most of the newcomers to our group struggle with being honest about their punishment thoughts. After all, we are loving spiritual beings who are striving to raise our vibrations and extend love to everyone. So... it makes it very difficult to be honest about our punishment thoughts since they are negative and hurtful and literally the opposite of what we want to think and feel. The key is that unless we can be honest about those negative thoughts, we cannot deal with them and remove them from our minds and our experience.
    So congratulations once again on being willing to honestly explore your punishment thoughts.
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    Replied by Susan on Saturday, September 22 2012, 12:13 AM · Hide · #2
    It was enlightening to see it so clearly, because it's not usually so. And thanks for the insight, because it has been feeling like my willingness is a step up lately. :)
    Sending Love!
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